Love… And Other Stuff

Hi guys, Today I don’t really feel like posting though I kind of have to with everything that has been going on this week.

Firstly, Love. Right now I am going through a rough love stage. I have always had crushes on boys since year 1, but now for the first time I have a crush on a girl (Lets call her Love Girl). So Love Girl and I are friends in the same classes at school. I don’t want to ruin that though. Does this mean I’m Bi or Lesbian? What do I do about it?

Next, Other Stuff. My depression has gotten worse lately. I am cutting more often and really want to kill myself. I am really struggling with my depression now. I am feeling it harder than ever now. I really really want to kill myself.

I’ll (Maybe) do another post tomorrow since this one was short but anyway.

bye,

-Tween Online Going offline

The Feels

Hi, I am posting today because I need to do a first proper blog before I can do one every week, sorry this is a kind of serious topic for me because this is something I have been struggling with for a year now.

I have Depression. I have a blackness in my soul that won’t go away. Whenever I have tried to tell other people, I have been called an ‘Attention Whore’. ‘A Bitch’. I was making progress and got one day clean but I couldn’t stop myself from cutting the next day. And the next. It’s out of control now.

I also have anxiety issues. Every morning before school, I wonder how I could stay home and not have to face my anxiety. When I do go to school, I am constantly fidgeting as well as trying to look normal and hide my scars.

I am worthless. I am stupid. I am an attention whore. I’m a slut. I’m a goodie two shoes. I’m a bitch. I starve myself.

I don’t know what to do. It’s getting out of control. Thats why I have posted this on my blog. I need help. I don’t know how to get it.

But random strangers who read this blog won’t care about me. No one cares about me. I am just a life form drifting around with no purpose.

What’s Your Say? 

• How can I get help?
• Have you ever had depression or anxiety?

Bye, till next week

-Tween Online… Going Offline

Hi World

I am Tween Online, an anonymous tween living life separated from my family, actually on the other side of the world as them in the small little dot of Fiji.

I was previously told to try start writing a diary to put my thoughts into, so that they were out but no one knew. Those diary entries went from detailed explanations of my day to 2 sentence recaps of what I had done that day. I started to realise that the diary didn’t do anything. The point of the diary was so I could share my feelings. I wrote as if I was talking to someone, but in reality no one would ever read it except for me. So I made this anonymous blog because then I know that someone, somewhere, knows my story and understands, even if they don’t know who I am.

So from now on you will hear from me every week because there are so many things I need to tell someone but wouldn’t dare say to someone I know.

This is going to be my little corner from the internet, secluded from the world, where I can be me and talk about all the stresses of being a (Nearly) teenage girl.

Before this blog, Reading was the only thing I could do to get away from the world, but now this is going to take me head-first into it.

So thank you for reading this (if anyone would actually read this) and thank you in advance for all the support.

What’s Your Say?

• Are there any things in your life that take you away from the world?

bye, and thanks,

Tween Online… Going Offline